Dear Muse,

I have composed a poem for the Muses. It is dedicated to all of them, but especially to Crraw:

All the Muses are 10 years old,

Kokopelli, pie-thrower bold,

Is the Muse of tunes and tricks.

Pwts bird-catchers net and Crraw the crow

do not mix,

Urania looks up at the stars,

While Chad the hardware Muse fixes more

than cars.

Bo spouts factoids readily,

But Feather plants a short young tree.

Mimi solves all our problems in a trice,

In the meantime, Aeiou's sleeves say, "Logic is nice."

All the Muses are equal in virtue,

Believe me, this magazine's the best; it's true!

If you don't believe me, see for yourself!!!!!

Margaret C, age 12, Illinois

Thank you for the lovely rhyme!

Although I write them all the time,

It isn't often that I see

A poet pen one just for me.

(Especially not another Muse

From them I mostly get abuse!)

-Crraw

What abuse are you talking about, Crraw?

-Pwt

Dearest Muse! (We worship you.)

Today we thought of the idea of making Muse-ic. We made music with certain instruments that we thought described the personality of each Muse:

Chad: solo guitar

Urania: abacus, anonymous percussion instrument, guitar

Aeiou: abacus, ukulele

Crraw: tambourine, miniature paino, accordion

Feather: drum, shaker

Mimi: abacus, drum

Bo: tambourine, lap harp, ukulele

Pwt: cymbals, bottle caps, anonymous percussion instrument

Koko: cymbals, recorder, guitar

This is us playing in Willa and Arlo's attic. I am the big kid with the red hair and the plaid headband. Willa is the girl with the braids and the purple shirt. Arlo is the guy in the green shirt who is playing the guitar.

Love,

Rosie D., Willa J., and Arlo J., Washington

(CRASH!!!)

-Kokopelli, on cymbals

Dear Muse,

I will begin with blatant praise (in simile form, chiz chiz!). Muse is like a pie, filled with facts like juicy fruits, comic Musings as satisfying as custard, and all encased in a glossy cover like flaky crust, perfect to awaken the appetite in anyone hungry for knowledge!!! I am proud to say that my brother and I, who have been getting Muse since near(ish) the beginning, can attribute much of our wisdom to Muse mag. We often enjoy stating random, intriguing facts and watching in pleased silence as the listeners face passes rapidly through disbelief, confusion, jealousy, and finally amazement as they say dazedly, "Where did you hear THAT?!" Our answer is, invariably, "Muse." Thanks for the many pleasures ye hath bestowed upon us, great Muse! I'm not actually the subscriber in the household, much as I hate to admit, but my brother is too busy with college admissions to write. YES! My brother is ready for college and would NEVER allow my parents to discontinue our subscription!!!! And, of course, neither would I.

Now, on to a more serious note: A matter addressed to the evasive Aeiou: I was searching your (as you are the Muse of software, I assume it's yours) website for the MuseBlog to discuss a few things with my fellow readers, but I was *gasp* unable to find it! I even typed it into the search box, but alas! Nothing came up. I was mortified and desolate. I suppose I could have gone back to find the issue that contained the exact URL for the blog, but what would those unfortunate few lacking the correct magazine do? Perhaps someone should look into making it easier to locate.

As for the Muses . . . I think it's sad how Chad, Aeiou and Crraw get so little fan mail! All three of you are amazing and brilliant, so don't lose hope! Keep on inventing, programming, and writing, because although Koko is undeniably lovable, he still shouldn't get all the attention!!! And a question for Aeiou-why did the Muse of Software become mute? I do hope nothing traumatic happened-a bad brush with the editors perhaps? Nasty little beasties, they . . .

Parasitically yours,

Sophia a.k.a. Aldarendil, age 14, California

Aeiou says that www.musefanpage.com/bbg should solve your URL woes.

-Crraw

(CRASH!!!) Why shouldn't I get all the attention?

-Kokopelli

O wondrous Muse magazine!

After not being published the first time I wrote to you, I've come up with a fool-/Kokopelli-proof plan to get into Muse. It goes like this:

1. Convince parents to take family to Sicily. All right, the parents were also in favor of this plan.

2. Take April 2007 issue of Muse to Sicily. Not my favorite Muse, but it was current. It also has the advantage of looking innocent when the airport officials decide we're terrorists.

3. Get lost in the twilight-zone-like town of Bagheria. Entreat Muses for help. Buy cannoli. Desperately need map.

4. Go to ancient Greek city of Segestra, which has also been at various points in history: a prehistoric cave dwelling, a medieval church, a medieval chapel, and a medieval mosque. All of which are ruined, except for the Greek temple and Greek theater! The Greek temple is huge and roofless (it was never finished) and still standing!!!

5. Marvel at the temple.

6. Sit down inside it and read Muse. Have mother take pictures.

7. Hike up nearby hill to theater, which is beautiful. Wait for Italian tourists to leave. Make up a single-person play on the spot when you find yourself alone in a Greek theater!!!

8. Enjoy self.

9. Go home. Get pictures developed.

10. Three months later: Find pictures on floor of room. Have nothing to do. Write to Muse, including pictures, which are a foolproof way of getting into magazines!

11. Draw illuminated-manuscript-type decorations on letter, including not-so-great Greek temple picture.

12. Send letter.

My Muse pile (under the dresser) dates back to April 2005. I like nearly everything you publish, except for the once-in-a-blue-moon Annoying Article. Please throw out your Annoying Article Generator (or crazed editor).

Writer-ingly yours,

Meg H., age 15 (by the time you publish this), Massachusetts

But we can't throw out the AAG, Meg; I built it myself!

-Chad

To the lovely Muse magazine!

Your magazine is fabulous! I especially love the random "Dear Muse Reader" bit on page one. It's very funny. I'm from England and I only thought I would write in because all the letters I have read from your readers in the magazine are all from American people! Not that there's anything wrong with coming from America, it's just that it makes me wonder if I'm the only British person who reads your magazine! So please, if you happen to be reading this letter and you also happen to be from Great Britain, write in! I would love to hear from you . .. that is, assuming the Muse editors are kind enough to publish this letter (pretty please!).

Thank you very much, love from your very English reader,

Gabbi, age 13, Great Britain

P.S. Does anyone else play the saxophone? I have been playing since I was 11 (I'm now 13 and am just starting Grade 6). Thanks again!

It's nice to see we have a friend across the pond. Maybe you and your sax can join our band!

-Mimi

Dear, Sweet, Apple of My Eye, Muse,

I LOVE YOUR MAGAZINE! I do a little happy dance every time you enter my home. I enjoy the many interesting facts you share with me with as much randomness as possible! If I could, I would eat, sleep, and BREATHE Muse. (I've tried, but as good as the magazine is, it doesn't taste very good. Koko, scratch that off the pie flavor list!) But I especially like the articles on the diseases and epidemics (I get joy from peoples' pain!). My favorite Muses are Koko and Bo! But all of you rock! And as a suggestion, maybe for an article you can have a SUPER LONG COMIC! I know; it's brilliant! Okay, and the bill for my brilliantness is $25.50! Normally I would just take a check but for my wonderful Muse, it costs nothing, unless you can pay me in magazines! Or just have this published! Otherwise I will send my blue alien bunnies to come to Kokopelli to buy a pie and throw it in all of your faces!! MWHAHAHA! Oh and it will be flavored with my mom's . . . TUNA CASSEROLE!!! MWHAHAHA!! Trust me; it gets no worse than that!

Sarah H., age 12, Ohio

Do you need me to fix the period key on your keyboard?

-Chad

Tuna casserole is delicious!

-Craaw

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